I have made it through the biggest time specific hurdle since becoming unwell, which is getting through nasty February without being admitted for serious illness resulting in months on end stays in hospital. This milestone has been a long time coming and I have waited 6 long years to say February was A-okay.
I don't know if it's the weather, getting run down or a combination of everything in my life colliding with my broken body, but around February every year since I got sick, without fail I have spent in hospital and coincidentally gotten seriously unwell with infections or other autonomic issues and embarked on super long admissions. This year is different. Yes, I have been admitted during February but I am currently lying in my bed in my room, at Home typing this and it feels so, so good!
It sounds like such a trivial thing to be celebrating but to me, it feels astronomical! I probably give it more significance than it deserves but I don't even care! I think my elation extends further than the cursed month because right now, I feel like I am doing really well. I am continuing to improve every month with my miracle treatment and have been able to start doing things I always hoped for but never dared to dream of. I am getting somewhere and I can feel the change is coming in some areas of my health.
It is not realistic to think that my life will follow a constant upward trend because, well, nobody's ever does, but right now I'm savouring this upward trend and trying to make the most out of it. Life with a chronic illness is so unreliable and I am continually learning this lesson on a daily basis. Despite the odds stacked against me, my family and I have been pushing and fighting for me to have a life beyond this illness and it seems like one day this could be more of a reality. Whilst this isn't something that will just go away with positive thinking, diet, life adjustments or medication (as of yet) this is something that is changing for the better. I am changing for the better.
February is over and I am ready to keep kicking chronic illness in the butt.
You're the best ever, this makes me so excited!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Jess!! Much appreciated! I'm pretty excited too 😀😀 xx
DeleteFist pumps! Oh Erika, you showed February that it's not f*&%ing with YOU! I am so happy for you, it is a massive achievement and I can feel your happiness through the words on he screen! I am happy dancing over in NZ for you! Here's to another month like that one!
ReplyDeleteNow thanks Rach - I love a good happy dance! It was a huge milestone so I couldn't miss the opportunity to brag haha! Hope you're well lovely xxx
DeleteI meant **aww* not *now* sorry! Hopeless autocorrect!
DeleteYay E!!!! That is awesome news.
ReplyDeleteThanks Em!!! it's so good, such a big thing in our world! Xxx
Delete